Man’s best friend is not only our companion and best friend but seen now as the new kid and part of the family unit. The majority of people adore children, although some adults prefer to do without the real kids and instead opt to become “dog parents” or kids who have fur. There are married couples who have made the well-thought-out decision to have dogs, not kids, and couples who want both or for “empty nesters” whose children are all group up and have left the nest, so now dogs have become their substitute children. Couples are also opting to have children later in life and instead fulfilling their maternal and paternal instinct by bringing a dog into the home, and there is an abundance of single girls and guys that just love dogs and want to have a best friend to hang out with. Who can resist that wagging tail and always happy to see you smile when you walk through that door and come home. All worries or the stresses of the day seem to disappear and your companion looks at you with his or her eyes of pure love and excitement. With millions of homes overflowing with dogs, today’s parents tend to recognize their beloved pets as family members, deserving of the same sort of services that parents would demand for their children. Dogs are family, and dog parents want to make sure that their four-legged children have a balanced and full life enriched with all the deserving amenities money can buy from the healthiest foods and wellness supplements to cozy beds and birthday parties with all the coolest and of course most well behaved pooches in town. Dogs are the new kids, and many dogs have a social calendar bursting with play dates, sleepovers, outings at the park, and spa days.
dogs are like special needs kids
According to an article in the Sunday Globe dogs are the new kids – at least for some upscale urban residents who don’t have kids (yet).
“With more professionals opting to wait longer before having children or getting married, dog specialists say urbanites are redirecting their attention and disposable income to their dogs, dropping hundreds of dollars to ensure that their four-legged friends get the best in food, grooming, wellness and care.” And why wouldn’t you? They give us constant unconditional love, they are a part of the family unit , always there for you to snuggle on a rainy day, the best workout partner, always there to make you smile and warm your heart, to remind you to always be present and enjoy the moment. Dogs are the new kids. I see an importance to help educate people on wellness so that they can feed them better food and give them the best care for optimal wellness to have a life of quality and to be with us longer as they are a part of the family, the new kids, and gods angels sent to us here on earth to remind us about the heart of love, to keep us connected to the earth and to smile each day and wag our tails.
The “dog mom” from one couple who doesn’t have kids says “She does not feel as though her family is missing anything. Gershwin (her lab mix) receives glowing report cards from Dog Day Afternoons (where he goes for the day care) and gets shampooed weekly at a grooming salon.”
What does this tell us about the essential motivation of humans? An obvious point – perhaps this behavior suggests that for some at least the need to care for “offspring” is genetic – and that if we don’t have our own offspring we look for substitutes.
Did you know that Seattle now has more dogs than children? So does San Francisco. In a recent poll, 45 percent of dog owners said that having a dog is better than having a child. There’s a popular book out called, “Why Dogs Are Better Than Kids” that , in a tongue-in-check style, explains why (“Dogs give you warning before they throw up in the car”). There are no college fees with dogs or talking back at you. Yes, dogs are the new kids but by no means are we saying that they are better than kids or that kids are better than dogs. They just have different roles in our lives – as they should. It makes me smile to see so many – millions of families taking their companion in as a true part of the family. The US has a birth rate of 13 births per thousand, down from 30 births per thousand at the beginning of the last century. At the same time, 63 million American households have dogs, up 23 percent in the last 10 years alone.
In a time where our technological society is ever increasing it is even more important to stay connected to the earth and the animal kingdom – to embrace our canine companions and connect with someone that needs that unconditional love back. Every where we turn we see wi-fi, remote pc access services, cell phones and networks that allow us to work where we want , often from home or even a far away remote place, now more than ever like never before. We talk with friends on the phone while we drive and do errands. We get our news online when we’re ready to read it, and shop without ever leaving home. We have video games that can simulate real life scenarios and online communities where you can become who you want and buy all the assets and amenities of a real life. You can become that online avatar persona and escape into a world where there are no consequences. Meanwhile as society and technology is creating this – it is also pulling us away from connecting to each other and the earth that has given us a home. We are becoming more isolated. We have chat rooms and internet game sites. College kids don’t study together or see each other at the library anymore: they do their homework online from their rooms. Even volunteering can be done without a time commitment. We’ve become so accustomed to having everything exactly when and how we like it – from news to shipping to social interaction – that we don’t have the patience for being around other people like we used to . We don’t want to wait in line. We don’t want to wait at the restaurant. We don’t want to even wait through commercials anymore. We don’t want to wait for our luggage at the baggage claim. We don’t want to wait to save up for what we want. Having choice is good. It drives free markets, keeps prices low, and gives consumers the power to decide who succeeds. Having convenience is good, too. But how much is enough? What happens to us when we have exactly what we want all the time on demand? I’m speaking in general terms, of course; there are always individuals who do prefer to live in seclusion. But as our society pushes all of us in that direction – slowly, steadily, byte by byte – I believe that many of us are reaching out to dogs to reconnect with someone who needs us. We are social creatures. We need a group. We need to connect. We crave for someone to love us , to protect us, someone to take care of us, someone who will be there for us no matter what. We have a need for family and safety in numbers. And while we may not be aware of it as we busy ourselves with conspicuous consumption and career maneuvering, it’s there.
Enter the dog.
Recent studies have found that having a dog reduces blood pressure and other effects of stress. That’s probably not why you and I got a dog, but we’re probably connecting with the things that make our blood pressure go down and warms our heart. Things like that wagging tail that greets us at the door, every single day. How many people in our homes get up and come to the door when we come home? The dog always does, and that feels good to us. The dog needs us. He depends utterly on us.
He’s not going to become independent and leave (well, not most dogs). So having a dog placates our abandonment fears. He’s not going to judge us, no matter what we wear, buy, eat , drive or look like. Now we’ve got an antidote to constant criticism from ourselves and others that plagues us day after day. He’s another heartbeat in what for some is an otherwise empty home. Now we’ve got companionship in an isolated world. No manipulation, tardiness, meanness, cheating or misunderstandings. I think most compassionate, responsible people’s lives would be enhanced by having a dog. But we need to also remember to reconnect with each other too and stay in tune with the earth. Let’s remind ourselves to be more patient , take more interest in each other, enjoy one another a little more, and help our children and the next generation to come stay connected to our planet and love it for all it’s beauty and to respect all living life with true compassion and understanding.
Let’s learn from our canine companions and honor them and the animal kingdom with compassion and gratitude for what they teach us every day and the true beauty in love that they share with us.
